Corn Maze

Yesterday we took the Venture Club (3rd-5th graders from church) to Suter's Corn Maze. Isaac groaned when he heard the rule that no running was allowed, but we all ended up having a fabulous time.

Boys

In helping Isaac and Seth to adjust to all the changes in their lives in the past months, I checked out the book Raising Cain: Proctecting the emotional life of boys. I know a lot is going on within them that they don’t know how to express or are choosing not to express. Here are a few notes I took from the book.

1. Give boys permission to have an internal life, approval for the full range of human emotions, and help in developing an emotional vocabulary so they can better understand themselves and communicate with others. Create space in life for sharing to happen…at bedtime, while driving, being outside together. Share moral dilemmas with them and talk about your own inner life with them.
   

2. Recognize and accept the high activity level of boys and give them safe places to express it. A Montessori school in Minneapolis allowed children to go into a designated space in the hallway to jump rope whenever they got restless. Wouldn’t that be great?
   

3. Talk to boys in a way that honors their pride and masculinity. Use them as consultants and problem solvers. Ask “How do you suggest we deal with this?” or “I would have felt frightened if it were me.” Ask how he thinks his friends feel about something.

4. Teach boys that emotional courage is courage, and that empathy and courage are the sources of real strength in life. Find models of moral and emotional courage and talk about them, both from history and in real life. Give them opportunities to experience empathy.
   

5. Use discipline to build character and conscience, not enemies. Guide rather than punish.
   

6. Model a manhood of emotional attachment.
   

7. Teach boys that there are many ways to be a man.

Bluffton University homecoming parade

Jonathan riding with our neighbor, Sara Chappell-Dick

Surprise connections

Our decision to move here was influenced partly by the connections we had here that we knew we would enjoy...friends from our Markham days, friends from our Chicago days, and a friend's extended family. And then there are little surprise connections that we are still discovering, like...

We live across the street from Jon's mom's college roommate and dear friend.
Seth's Sunday School teacher is a dear woman we visited in Japan when I was in 8th grade.
Seth's piano teacher is my third cousin.
The house we hope to buy belongs to the dad of the guy we rented Jon's dad's house to in Newton.

We are so grateful to be a part of a web of relationships that goes back since before we were born.

COSI science museum in Toledo

We had a fun day, riding a bike on a high wire, watching a loud demonstration on combustion, creating funny faces, walking in a slanted house, giving babies shots, making discs spin, getting soaked playing with water and pipes. (Click on a photo to enlarge it.)

Things Theo communicated with sign language (and a few words) this week

There is Bobbie's house. Bobbie is sleeping (house was dark). Let's go pick raspberries in her back yard.

There is where Dada works.

Mama, play that game where you try to eat the food off my spoon, I eat it, and then you cry!

Isaac, take me outside to look for fire trucks.

Seth is at school.

Keep singing and patting my back while I'm trying to go to sleep.

There is Oma's car.

Mama, go outside with me and mow the lawn. (not now) OK, Dada, go outside with me and mow the lawn.

Things I'm loving in Bluffton...

There are many things I'm loving about living here. These are the first things that came to mind...

People walking past and stopping for a while to chat

Weekly community meal with friends

Weekly frisbee that is fun even for women and people who don’t run so fast anymore

New Zealand friend who became a feminist at 14

Friend who taught me a beautiful song that Patty Shelly wrote when she was 18

Friend who invited me to start a new business with her

Walking and biking everywhere

$3 movie theater

Watching soccer games

The raspberries growing in the garden (that our landlord planted)

The swiss chard that Bobby lets us pick from her garden

Playing, watching the rain, and reading on our front porch

Lots of people who Theo is comfortable staying with

The large Saturday Farmer’s Market